zondag 14 november 2010

Dancing into the world.


I am so optimistic about Pelle’s development. I really think he can outgrow his difficulties. Two amazing things happened last week.
Friday, we had a classmate coming over to play. Pelle wanted to show him his favorite film on YouTube, which is about a mill. At first I was a bit hesitant. Because I have this conviction that watching television or sitting behind the computer screen is not good for the development of a child. Children should play, not watch.
But in this whole process of raising my special boy, I have to learn some things. Like letting go off some rigid aspects of my belief system. Because watching this film was not at all about being passive and just absorbing what’s presented to you. For Pelle, it proved to be an excellent way to start communicating with the other boy, asking questions and responding to answers. As I was in the kitchen doing the dishes I overheard them, and was very pleased, because this was really a first, talking so long to another boy. So he has this motivation to talk and share, and when there’s already a common ground (the movie) it’s easier for him to interact.
Yesterday, there was another prove that I need to revise my convictions about watching telly. In stead of killing his imagination, it helps him to elevate it.
Pelle set up a little tent in our living room. Until now, just clicking the poles together and raising the fabric was the fun he had. He could not do anything else with it. But yesterday, he pretended to be a miller, and acted out what he saw in the film. He even stretched his imagination by wanting to close the door to read a newspaper inside. “What does it say in the paper?’, I asked. After some time he replied “It’s about Sinterklaas”. And on he went, opening and closing the door, being busy in the mill and wanting Mark to look at a pretend window. I was thrilled.
It looks like every new skill or development pairs with a relapse into more repetitive behavior. Like he needs to hang on more to familiar grounds while exploring others. I see it as his way to dance in this world. I’m learning to read his performance.

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